Category Archives: Money

Controversy Alert: I Think We Went Too Far Again With 2 Gay Hoteliers

I’m not going to win any popularity points here, but I think our LGBT Community has gone over the edge a bit in boycotting the two gay men from NYC, who hosted Bigoted Senator Ted Cruz, in their NYC apartment.  There are valid points on each side, and being as such, boycotting men who have also given so much to our Community, seems extremely short-sided.  Senator Cruz is by no means a friend to our LGBT causes, but there are a few ideological points that everyone can have in common.  From what I’ve read, stances on Israel was the link that brought these people together.

Important factors to me on the event, includes that it was NOT a fundraiser to help the Senator in his quest for being President; and There WAS some discussion on LGBT issues, including Cruz’s steadfastness in opposition to gay marriage, however saying that if his daughter was gay, he would love her no different or less.  Do I wish that the event didn’t happen?  Yes AND No!

If I had the money and influence to be able to meet with a powerful Senator in Congress, (regardless of your thoughts on the man’s positions, you have to admit he does hold sway over a certain segment of the legislature), I would welcome the chance to talk to him in my home to try to persuade him to my point of few, and offer examples of how wrong his thinking is on the issues we don’t agree with.  I’m not saying the two men did that, but they had that ability to do it.  We should be engaging those that are actively trying to quash our best interests, but let’s do it face to face and not just by not spending our money on them, we both lose that way.

So creating a discussion is one thing, actively raising money for someone who has clearly stated views against items that are important to us is just wrong, no matter how many other ideas you can agree with, if the one sticking point makes you or your Community less than anyone or anything, you should not support that with your money.  It was made clear by the New York Times, that this was not a fundraiser.

From what I have read and heard, these two gay men have been steadfast in giving back to the LGBT Community in and around NY.  I know for a fact that he has donated space for free to hold major fundraisers at locations they own.  Now because of simply meeting with the Senator, we are asking our Community to stop spending money at their establishments, where they have used that money for so many worthy causes for us?  This does not make sense logically or in my heart of hearts.

Can we not just sit down with these two reasonable men and air our grievances with what they have done.  Educate them on the optics and our concerns, just as I would hope they were doing to Senator Cruz on our LGBT issues.  Ask for another donation to HRC or some worthwhile charity as a token of their understanding about our Communities concerns.  There are a lot of thoughtful ways we could have handled this situation and we failed to do so.

I hope you will comment on this with your ideas as well.  Agree with me, or disagree, but please take the time to give me your opposite points of view, I would greatly appreciate reading what I may be missing in this conversation….Scott

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The Slow Demise of the Gay TINKs….

I know I just scared half of the older gay males, but don’t worry, and that was not a misprint. I am not talking about the fresh-faced, smooth, young, gay male sub-set of 18-24 year olds, commonly referred to as “Twinks,” I was alluding to the fading presence of gays with, “Two Incomes, No Kids,” (TINKs). Our straight friends often refer to themselves and us gays as DINKS, (Double Incomes, No Kids). One of my best friends and his partner, are the latest to take the leap and adopt a real, live, infant, in addition to the family pets that have been our children for so, so long.

In this cultural renaissance, where we are able to live a little more out and proud these days, and indeed with gay marriage being the law of the land in over half of our country now, more and more gay couples are adopting and creating children in record numbers.  Same sex adoptions have more than doubled, in just 10 years time.  Where before we would be saving our money for the gay pride celebration in Amsterdam, or the White Party Weekend in Palm Springs, we are now counting our pennies for pre-school waiting lists and family health insurance premiums.

For years, what little research and sampling that has been done, has shown that gay male couples, usually make about 41% more than the national average income of couples.  This has created a much bigger pocket of disposable income in years past, and it is still true to a large degree today, although with more gay couples with children, it’s not quite as disposable as it once was.  This is a big reason why you are seeing more and more major corporations marketing to the LGBT community now.  It’s not about the marketing of equality as much as it is about our gay community spending more and more money on the things that “traditional” families have been spending money on for ages.

Unfortunately, the flip side of this shows our lesbian community has not been able to take advantage of the double incomes as much as our gay males have.  Not only have our sisters had to fight for equality in their relationships, they have also had to spread their resources to fight the unfair wages paid to male counterparts across the board.  Most women, gay or straight, still usually earn about 70 cents to the dollar that men make.  Combine this with the fact that a lot of lesbian couples have more children than gay male couples; the cards can definitely be stacked against them.  Looking at the current marketing campaigns for same sex couples that have been increasing lately, it is noticeable that it is mostly male couples being advertised to.  The stereotype of the two male income buying power is still present.

I want to congratulate my best friend on his new adorable baby girl.  I know that he and his partner are going to make excellent parents, and I look forward to being Uncle Scotty.  The new debate in their family is now to decide if they are going to “OINK,” (be a One Income, New Kid), family and have one of them stay home with the little one. Okay, I may have made that acronym up, but the debate is still the same.  I hope they can remain the same power gay couple I have always known them to be, but if not, who cares, they have more important things to spend their money on now.  They are going to be the best daddy’s I know, and let Uncle Scott spoil her rotten with his currently disposable income, I have always wanted an Easy Bake Oven!…………..S